The Experiment is my serialised novel, but it’s more than that. It will see me write and publish the first draft of a novel (‘draft zero’) - with no polishing and no eyes on this other than mine, and then yours, of course. This is a daunting prospect, as one of the things I firmly believe about draft zero is that one should write it safe in the knowledge that no one will see it at all. Yet here I am, sharing it with you all!
What follows is a link to Chapters 1 and 2, followed by Chapter 3. Today I’d like to extend my thanks to Tom Davenport who made the suggestion ‘A young and gifted musician overhears a distant melody, and knows his life will never be the same.’ While I haven’t used that directly, it did spark something which I think will develop in future chapters.
Do let me know what you think! At the end of this post is an invitation for you to help shape the story as it develops. Enjoy, and keep your eyes open for the next chapter soon. And don’t forget, though the chapters themselves will always be free, paying subscribers will also get all the background and behind-the-scenes posts as the story develops, as well as all my other posts. All that, for around £1 per week (less if you pay for a whole year in advance), and your subscription will help to enable me to continue this project. So please do consider upgrading your subscription.
Before we dive in…
Do you remember ‘Choose your own adventure stories’? At the end of this chapter there’s a poll, in which you can vote for the direction in which you’d like to see the story develop…
CHAPTER 3
Leah stared at her. Her gaze was hurt, penetrating. Her eyes were narrow, her expression unreadable.
It was a surprise. Toni might’ve expected almost anything else — shock, fear, horror, even a kind of detached numbness — but not this. Leah’s expression was almost judgmental .
She can’t have heard her, she thought. Or she’d misheard perhaps. It was the shock; Toni had effectively crept up on her friend, after all, in the middle of the night, when she was at work. Leah would’ve thought herself alone in the control room, the only thing she had to worry about was looking after Frank, and the progress of the group trying to escape from the room below.
She said it again. ‘Isaac’s—‘
‘Dead. Yes. You said.’
She sounds almost bored. This isn’t right. Leah has been her best friend forever. Ever since they met, that day in the camp when they’d both lost their parents but hadn’t, quite, realised they’d never get them back. She’s never been like this.
‘Leah? You’re scaring me.’
Leah took her arm. Not roughly, but without compassion. It was how she imagined she shepherded the escape room guests through the fake airlock that made no sense. She’s seen her do it. This way, she says, you have an hour before he wakes up. Then? You’re toast. He’s in an electric chair for a reason folks, and I’m not convinced he’s dead.
‘You don’t seem surprised.’
‘Sit down.’
‘Leah? What is it? You’re being—‘
‘I’m sorry,’ she said, almost forcing Toni back into a chair . ‘But tell me. Tell me everything.’
‘Like I said,’ said Toni. ‘It’s Isaac. He’s dead.’
‘How?’
She started to shake. The room felt suddenly airless and far too hot. How could anyone stand it?
‘I can’t say.’
‘Start at the beginning.’
‘I need a drink.’
There was a bottle of water on the desk and Leah handed it over.
‘You’re fine,’ she said. ‘You’re safe. This is today? What happened?’
Toni thought back. A tape rewinding erratically, the picture half lost to static and noise. The journey here, mounting the bike. Standing over Isaac with a gun in her hand.
That was as far as she could get. The tape unspooled, there. The screen turned blank.
‘I can’t. I don’t remember.’
‘Give me your hands.’
Leah grabbed her wrists and turned her hands over, palms up. When Toni looked down she saw Leah’s scars, a crisis-cross on her forearms, an intricate web. Some of them looked fresh. Leah had been a cutter; it looked like she’d started again.
‘You remember getting up this morning?’
‘You’ve started cutting again.’’
Leah shook her head, just once. ‘This isn’t about me.’ She handed her a tablet. ‘Take this.’
‘What—?’
‘Just take it. You trust me. Don’t you?’
Toni did as Leah had said.
‘When did you start cutting again?’
‘I never stopped. But listen.’ She stared straight at her. ‘You swallowed it?’
‘Yes.’
‘You remember this morning? Anything?’
Toni thought back. A blank, there was nothing. She shook her head.
‘No, I—‘
‘Yesterday, then?’
She nodded. ‘We went out.’
‘Who?’
‘Me and you. And Isaac.’
Leah nodded. ‘Good.’
‘What was that?’
Leah ignored her. ‘Where did we go?’
‘The Liquid Lounge.’ [This will have to change]
‘Good. How did we get back?’
‘We walked.’
‘Where?’
‘We always walk.’
‘Where, Toni?’
‘The Rat House.’
‘Okay. All three of us?’
She nodded. It was like looking at a distant screen, but through a dense scrim of thickening fog. She could see the three of them. Isaac in the middle, her and Leah flanking him. The streets were dead, the rain was pelting down.
Is it always raining? Lately it feels like it’s always raining. It feels wrong.
‘Where did you sleep?’
‘With Isaac.’
‘And me?’
‘In your room. Of course. Where you always—‘
‘I live in The Rat House?’
Toni laughed. As if she didn’t know? She opened her mouth to answer her friend, but she found she couldn’t. The words weren’t there, and she couldn’t go deep enough to find them.
What was going on? Why didn’t Leah remember? Why was Leah looking at her as though it was she who had the problem? A chill suddenly began at the base of her spine. She’d gone from too hot to freezing cold in under a minute.
‘Why don’t you remember?‘
Leah ignored her. ‘Toni.’ She gripped her wrists tightly. ‘Try. What happened when you woke up?’
Toni shook her head. This was futile, pointless. Leah kept asking her the same thing. Over and over, as if suddenly she’s going to remember.
Suddenly, the projector seemed to flash. An image, Toni waking up, Issac next to her, sunlight streaming through the curtains. A poster behind him, pinned to the wall, peeling in one corner. Some film from before times, but not one she remembers, not one she’s seen. So why is it pinned on her wall?
A fear, stirring deep in her gut.
Isaac? she says, quietly. Wake up.
‘You remember?’
She nods, but doesn’t speak. Isaac opening his eyes. Bleary, sleepy. Full of love. Why had she shot him, just twelve hours later, maybe fourteen? What had happened in that time? And where did she even get hold of a gun?
‘Talk to me.’
She sank back into the memory and the rest of the day unspooled, glitchy and unfocussed, unravelling on Fast-Forward. They fuck, her breath smells but so does his and neither of them seem to care. There’s breakfast, some bread he’d toasted downstairs and brought up along with a mug of instant coffee that had the powder still floating in it. He gazed at her with a sleepy-eyed desire as he handed it over. What shall we do today?
Babe? I need to work.
‘Work,’ she said to Leah. ‘I had to go to work.’
‘You normally work on a Tuesday?’
‘Yes,’ she said, but it felt wrong. ‘No. I’m not sure.’
Her phone ringing. Earlier, when she was in bed and he was in the kitchen. Can you work today?
‘They asked me to come in,’ she said to Leah. ‘It must’ve been yesterday.’
‘Good. So you went to work. And?’
And?
‘It was just the same as always. I delivered pizzas.’
‘How many? How?’
‘On my bike. Like usual. I don’t know. We weren’t that busy, but… just the usual amount I guess.’
‘Okay. Then what?’
Nothing. There’s nothing there.
‘Toni?’
‘I don’t know. I just delivered pizzas.’ She looked up at her friend. She didn’t get it. This new obsession with trivial details when Isaac’s body was lying across the city, just waiting to be found. ’Fuck’s sake, Leah. Why does it matter? Why does any of this—’
Flash. The sky turning grey. Rain. A downpour, unseasonably heavy and utterly unexpected. She wouldn’t mention it, otherwise.
‘It started to rain.’
‘It’s always fucking raining.’
‘No,’ said Toni. ‘I remember it being weird. Like, it shouldn’t be raining at the time of year.’
Leah’s head tilted quizzically, but she said nothing. She stands at the hatch, she can see into the kitchen. They have a new chef, one she doesn’t recognise and hasn’t been introduced to.
Still, it’s not a surprise. Most people there don’t even know her name.
’I picked up an order,’ she said. ‘Two pizzas.’
Two. Why had there been two?
‘Okay? And?’
Flash. The receipt flapping in the wind.
‘I checked the ticket. I always do. If it’s the wrong one it’s us who gets it in the neck. Anyway, it was odd because—‘
Shit. That’s Isaac’s favourite. What are the chances? She checks the ticket once more.
Hey, are you sure this is the right address?
Coco blows her a raspberry kiss. If that’s what it says, that’s what it says.
‘Isaac’s pizza, but not his address. The wrong end of the city.’
‘So you take it. And?’
There’s nothing.
‘What’s the place like?’
‘A mansion block. A bit of a dump.’
‘Then what?’
‘I knocked. I remember someone coming to the door.’
‘No. Go back. Did anything else happen?’
‘When?’
‘Earlier. Between picking up the pizzas and getting to Isaac’s.’
‘It wasn’t Isaac’s—‘
‘Think, Toni.’
‘I don’t remember.’
‘It’s important.’
She shook her head and gripped the arm of the chair. Leah was still holding her wrist. Her nails were digging in, though it didn’t look like she was doing it on purpose. The headphones were on the desk. She could hear the near-panic from the guests in the escape room as the clock wound down towards zero. On the screens Frank sat immobile in the electric chair, wearing his prosthetics. They’ll have poked and prodded him as soon as they arrived. They’re supposed to believe he’s a mannequin. That’s why it’s so terrifying if he wakes up and they’re still in there.
‘Toni! Stay with me.’
‘I don’t—‘
A burst of light, too bright, the image overexposed. Her phone is ringing.
‘Someone rang me,’ she said.
Leah’s eyes flared.
‘Who?’
She was whispering.
‘Who, Toni?’
She tried to go back. The rain, the street, the steaming pizzas. Stardash. Gorgonzola with jalapeños.
The gun in her pocket.
‘Toni?’
Violins. Cellos.
’There was some music.’
Leah nods.
‘And?’
‘And a voice.’
Leah spoke so softly she could barely hear her.
‘What did it say?’
‘Something about needing something,’ said Toni. ‘Studying the music. I don’t remember.’
Leah nodded once, as if her worst fears had been confirmed, then she spoke.
‘“I’m going to need you to study the subtle nuances in the melodies of this classical symphony?”’
Toni felt herself fall. That was it, that was it exactly. What the hell did it mean?
‘Leah?’ she said, but before her friend could answer chaos erupted on the screen behind her, and through the headphones came a weirdly distorted screaming. Frank had woken up.
What next? There are a few ways I can see the story developing.
A) Leah insists Frank is dangerous and the two friends escape
B) Frank joins them and he and Leah tell Toni some hard truths about what’s going on
C) When sees Frank’s face on the monitor he looks like Isaac
D) Leah tells Toni she’d heard the same weird message on her phone
E) A brand new character walks through the door…
Vote for the one you like the most here, or add your own suggestion below!
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What if Isaac walked through the door?
From 'Leah stared at her' >>> 'Frank had woken up' the Draft 0 story thickens with unpredicted detail - Toni is taken aback at Leah's reaction which hinges on take this pill (unquestioned) and endure interrogation - and the appearance of a further character, Frank, briefly at the top and tail of this chapter.
There's a sense of urgent necessity in Leah's pushing Toni to remember and in so doing establish a timeline ... which suggests that Leah knows more than Toni had a clue about, which seems, somewhat confirmed when Leah fills in the spoken words that Toni can't reach to recall: chilling.
I'm beginning to think that there is something criminal in the mix but as to what it might be it's too early to say. And Isaac has been dead for three chapters but SJ seems taken with a suggestion that he should reappear, or would resurrection be the better way of thinking about the possible return of a gun shot to the head blood every where cadaver.
I text B. "Could be we have a case of a cadaver who is going to come back in from the cold."
B's back in jiffy "🤔". I was making a joke but B's taken me seriously. And that 'jiffy' makes me wonder if he's keeping his 👁🗨 on me?
I'm getting in deeper, now wanting to know more about who Frank is (was he the guy strapped into the electric chair hardwired through the colander sat on his head?) and what the consequences of Leah taking her 👀 taken off her work in the control room might be?
So, with things stirring my curiosity, it looks like I'll be 🧾ing on into Chapter 4.